In which I attempt to watch every film in The Criterion Collection and end up watching a lot that aren't. Click here for the rating system.



"Horsey runs the coursey."

Now I know what you're thinking. You're thinking, hey, Sarah, how come you write these film reviews on movies that the whole entire rest of the world has already watched? And I will answer you by saying this, "I write about these films that get nominated to high heaven for awards and are overwatched so that you, my beloved reader, can know how I feel about them." And that is the entire reason. I know you all watched Seabiscuit. You did, didn't you? You probably went with one of your drinking buddies and his girlfriend, or your Aunt Marge, or some of you, heaven forbid, went alone. But most of you went with your step-brother and your Dad whom you haven't seen in, like, three months.

This is a well-watched American main-stream movie about a horse with heart. A story of a horse and his whiney voiced, watery-eyed, puke-faced jockey who makes you wanna curl up and die every time he comes on the screen. Haha. Just kidding. He isn't puke-faced. But I never got the Toby mystique. Am I missing it? Am I supposed to be crooning over him, his looks, his talent? Cuz he seems like the same little shrimp-weasel who inhabits every part with the face of a slaughtered lamb and the passion of a high-school drama star.

Hehe. No, really, he was great. Just great. Loved him.

But seriously, Jeff Bridges was wonderful, wasn't he? I mean this is no Big Lebowski, but something about Jeff Bridges inspires confidence in even this anti-hollywood-film watcher's heart. He's so darn big and cuddly. And he looks very nice in that hat.

And because I cannot avoid the whole "real historical" basis of this film, I present you with a lovely glimpse of fiction versus history.

Watch this movie if you need something long and put together well enough to make you want to finish it. Otherwise, don't watch it. It's just Tobey McGuire with a dye job.

Favorite moments: Uhm. Wow. Don't really have 'em. It was an enjoyable film, but the only thing that stood out to me was Red's horrible leg-crushing accident where he lies in a gruesomely rendered heap at front of camera. Oops, hope I didn't wreck it for the two of you out there who haven't watched it.


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