In which I attempt to watch every film in The Criterion Collection and end up watching a lot that aren't. Click here for the rating system.


Dog Day Afternoon

Made in 1975, Dog Day Afternoon chronicles the adventures of two men attempting to rob a bank. Because it is summer and it is hot, the movie is named Dog Day Afternoon.

I don't know what it is. Maybe I'm in a funk, because despite the fact that I've been watching on average four films a week, I can't seem to find the enthusiasm I need to want to review them. I mean, who cares? A film made in 1975 about a gay guy who robs a bank so his male wife can have a sex change operation while his female wife screams at him over the phone and his accomplice goes kinda psycho and wants to kill everybody? So what?

I feel kind of gypped watching this movie in 2006, when in 1975 gay lovers are risque, nobody ever thought of asking for an airplane before and to see people glistening with sweat on screen was the height of realism. Nowadays that mush is lame, cliched, redundant. So I'm cheated from the experiential shock the first viewers had of this movie. I don't know what the hell they mean when they are all shouting "Attica!" because that is ancient history. So is anger at the police. Been there, done that, so tired of talking about it. Don't get me wrong, it was a good movie. At parts it was even a great movie (I mean where else can you see Prince Humperdink acting like a little girl?), but I'm not gonna go on and on about it.

There, I've said my bit. If you like a depressing movie every now and again. See it. G'ahead. I don't care.

Favorite bits: Jumping to reach the cameras, Mouth, "What country you wanna go to?" "I've always wanted to go to Wyoming."


Under The Tuscan Sun

"Remember that time when you got divorced and accidentally visited Italy when your lesbian best friend sent you on a "Gay and Away" Tour and you bought a house on a whim and stayed there for years and years with no money on a tourist visa, but still living in fabulous wealth, having a fling with a married Italian guy and then finding a great American wanderer to heal your heart all while cooking great food and learning Polish? Yeah. That was awesome!"
Favorite Moments: The storm, the lady in the black hat, Italian men.

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